late afternoon, friday style

beautiful women everywhere. me in a cafe buzzed on a third of my pint and waxing poetic.

a good moment, this.

so much!

feeling the love today...and the magic of spring things blooming. wisteria and jasmine take over the air in these parts and soften the days. it's a fantastic truth about living in this bay area where there are in fact seasons, just subtle seasons.

having a moment of appreciation for the people in my life. so, people, if you're reading this, you are appreciated!!

in other news, after a long and torturous few months of not knowing whether or not my school is closing, dying, imploding...the answer is yes, all of the above. AND i'll be able to finish my degree. (thank you to all of the gods i can think of.) i have two months to fit in a semester and thesis, so here i go. squeeking this master's degree through...barely.

time to go outside.

weekend bliss

A grey fall morning beckoned me outside and I came grudgingly. To coffee, a pumpkin muffin, and finally, not yet ready to call it coffee-shop quits, a mug of peppermint tea. Because once I made it outside, through the laborious process of choosing the pants and shirt and socks and then making them fit over my body, once I put the helmet on my head and pedaled up the hill streets to this place, I discovered I quite like this grey fall morning. And I thank it for beckoning so strongly.

Fanfuckingtastic

I had a fabulous summer. Just looked over the pictures on this here blog and remembered...wow. Italy, Switzerland, Prague, Napa, Humboldt camping, home.

Lucky, lucky girl I am!

Neglect!

Poor, sad little blog. And now the three people who checked in occasionally have probably moved on...poor little blog.

So! Life moves on...things get crazy and busy...I (apparently) find renewed faith in capitalizing letters at the beginning of sentences. Stranger things have happened.

Here's the run down of all that's going on:

1. I'm nearing the end of my semester of insanity, which means the insanity is on hyperdrive. I have more pages of theoretical analysis to write in the next three weeks than I can fathom. And then there's that little video project...and that other paper. Oy.

2. And then there's that little internship. Good times getting practice doing "real" writing...meaning, published. But I get stressed out about that whole "what if I really suck at this...what if I've chosen a bad path" conversation. Then I go get another cup of coffee...or download another episode of Weeds ;-)

3. Working still doing officey stuff. Learning little, but know what I'm doing and the parameters of what's expected which is absolutely relieving. Plus, nice to get a little paycheck every few weeks.

4. Relationship is good, little downs, little ups, overall direction of goodness. Home is happy, even if my piles of paper are overtaking every surface in that one room. Cat is a pain in the arse...keeps getting his ass kicked (in fights he instigates). Not the smartest pussy on the block. And vet bills are not so very cheap, FYI.

5. I keep thinking...when stuck in traffic, when riding BART, when stuck in some more traffic...about singing and how much I used to dream of being in a band and writing songs with other people and rocking out. And now I don't spend any time making that happen and that's so so sad. I don't even sing in the shower very often. And that's the saddest thing of all...except my neighbors probably don't think so. C'est la vie.

Back to work I go.

“bottle up and explode, over and over…”

those are the first words to the song in my ears. i'm heading for an explosion myself...big messy, goopy, blubbering exploding over.

it's safest to stand back.

8:23pm

apparently, lists are all the rage these days. so, superlist of this exact moment, right here and now:

1. i LOVE my fancy headphones - they transform listening to music from something my ears to to something my whole body experiences. and they make me remember how much i love music. and the breadth of emotion it conjures. fanfuckingtastic.

2. the book "elements of journalism" is winking at me, taunting me to read it. but that would be too easy. and then i'd be prepared for class on wednesday...and really, what fun is that? instead i'm blogging and drinking, ahem, cognac.

3. a dear friend of r is in the midst of heartbreak, life upheaval, very very very sad. she's in our living room right now, where r is trying to comfort her...but really, there is nothing to do in the middle of a breakup but to be sad and heartbroken. which is absolutely no fun at all. negative fun. i wish there was a magic pill to take, to jump right on over all that feeling horrible crap. i would take it from time to time myself. but there isn't. so, in the mean time, we have yummy dinner, a spare bed, and compassionate ears to offer.

4. we (me and r) are approaching our 5th anniversary. it blows my mind.

the end.

superlist #1 superb bay area moments

1. I appreciate any workplace that drills book bins into the bathroom stall walls because, hey, everybody poops. And while you’re staying put for a while, why not read The Philosophy of Metallica in the mean time. Or the autobiography by Tori Spelling’s psychic. Not a minute to waste is what I say. (Full disclosure: I haven’t ever opened one of these books, just marveled at their existence.)

2. One of the candidates for SF mayor is named Chicken. 'Nuff said.

3. Tonight is Wood’s final performance. Not sure if that means they’re all stopping, or if one or two band members are on to the next thing. Even if I haven’t made it to any of their shows (which is really sad, since a friend is one a member of the band), I really love knowing there’s a 70’s drag king band rocking out in the wee hours every so often. www.woodkings.com

4. Burning Man shmurningman. It’s over. Let’s talk about something else for a few months.